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Nooralhuda MOOSA

Page history last edited by Juan M Garcia 12 years, 7 months ago

Nooralhuda's Essays

 

Please copy and paste your drafts in the spaces provided.  

 

ESSAY QUESTION (copy here):

 

FIRST DRAFT

 

IEP 510/520 Core 

Prof. Christine Bauer-Ramazani 

Date: 

Student Name:  Nooralhuda Moosa

Course No: IEP 520 Writing

Professor Name: Bauer-Ramazani

Date:12/7/2011

Nature or nurture? Discuss the different research opinions with respect of the influence of nature/nurture on attitudes toward change illustrate your answer with examples which is more prominent influence in your opinion explain your reasons.

 

The ability to change is affected by nature and nurture. They are different because nature is biased on genetic and nurture is biased in environment. Psychologists indicate that the five traits change after the age of 30, but some research suggests that openness declines in adulthood. It is shown that aging play an important role in change.

Change is affected by genetic. According to Caplan and Douglas(2011),that personality of someone tend to be change after of 30 . In addition some research mentioned that openness declines in early 20 .These concept fit around the whole world according to Caplan and Douglas(2011),as people of all culture aging they become lessopene. Moreover, Riemann most people experienced the same situation in their life. On the other hand, research still figuring out whether the opens decline or not.

Nurture or environments an important factor because it affects the ability of change. Most people around the world have the same desires or experience in life .Having a family to take care of is one of men and women dreams .In that way people become fullness of life tasks. In addition the ability to change inside someone who has endless tasks becomes a difficult equation. Furthermore trying new experience and having many tasks may help refresh someone mind but it will lead to insecurity. Eventhough some people try to change their habit; they find themselves are turned to what is familiar or known to them because it was adapted in the Braine.

In conclusion, the ability of change is affected by environment or nurture. There are many evidence prove that for instance, sometimes people face difficult satiation and it force them to make such unbelievable change. In another word, make juice from lemon. It is not necessary that aging decrease the ability to change because people become more free when they get old so they can change according to Caplan and Douglas(2011), that it seemed that people are able to change when they get old and finish all tasks.      

Reference

Caplan, N., & Douglas, S. (2011). Q skills for success: Reading and writing. New York, Ny : oxford

university press.

 

 
RUBRIC 
1. All parts of the essay question answered?

3

2. Thesis statement / main idea stated at the beginning?
3. Several supporting examples/reasons given? 4 
4. Several in-text citations/references made to the article/author/research?
5. Reference given in APA format?

 

The essay questions is well divided and described  at the beginning of each paragraph. 

The thesis statement  is at the beginning of each paragraph, and it let the reader keep track of the writing. Some grammatical mistakes should be change in order to make the whole idea even easier to understand.

The examples are given after each main idea, and they are easy to understand.

The in-text citation makes the reference of the lecture.

Because of the Wiki format, it is hard to tell if the APA format is given propertly,  I can highlight that the reference is linked to the in-text citation.

 

I think some grammar mistakes can be improved.  

SECOND DRAFT

 

FIRST DRAFT

Name:

Course: IEP/510/520 Core

Prof. Christine Bauer-Ramazani

Student Name: Nooralhuda Moosa

Course No:IEP 520 Writing

Professor Bauer-Ramazani

Date:

 

  Traveling is a leisure activity

 

         Modern life is impossible without traveling .In their article, “How is the demand for travel? Some conceptual and measurement considerations,” Mokhtarian & Salomon (2001) said that total travel is growing and travel for leisure purposes appears to be growing share of total travel. Imagine your boss asked you to prepare yourself next week to travel somewhere to present the company product! How do you feel? When I was working as a teacher in my country my boss asked me to travel to Jordan to attend a conference.  Even though that journey was for work, I had a lot of fun traveling. In their article, “How is the demand for travel? Some conceptual and measurement considerations,” Mokhtarian & Salomon (2001) indicate  that leisure activities currently account for half of total distance traveled in the UK, Germany, and swedeg , respectively. In his article, “Exit to exotica,” Winton (1992) indicate that “Obviously it makes goods sense, one you have flown halfway round the globe , to do something more than a business deal. Traveling should be considered leisure because it gives us opportunity relaxation, adventure, and the chance to visit sight seen.

 

 

First, traveling should be counted as leisure because it gives us a chance to relax and get rid of daily stress. Many countries offer good places to relax and to spend free time such as Czech Republic. Czech Republic offer natural therapy and many tourists travel there in their spare time, for example they have hot spring and they encourage traveler to immerse themselves inside it to enjoy the relaxation scenic. Traveling to these kinds of places has to consider an awesome experience to spend the time in and absolutely refreshing for the person’s mind. Furthermore, it gives energy to continue working in a good mood. In her article, “Slow down-we’re movin too fast: by putting the leisure back in leisure travel, we can enrich our experiences. Other benefits: reduced carbon emissions and no more jetlag,” Loftus (2008) stated that when we relax we start to know the places better than someone who zipped throw any place quickly.” .Traveling to quiet places in the holiday is highly recommended to the relaxing seeker. Traveling to Quiet islands are defiantly good choice to have vacation and relax for instance, the Maldives, Hawaii, and the Indonesian islands according to Winton, K (1992). These islands offer many kind of aroma and oily massages, which are relax our body and our brain. Daily life has a quick rethym , and traveling must be a good solution to renew our life,  decrees stress, and have fun.

 

 

Second, Traveling for face new situation ought to be the most exciting part in journey. When traveler decide to travel to do something new in their spare time, adventure should be amazing idea to satisfy them. Despite the fact that mountains is too high to climb, many traveler choose mountainous places climb in their free time and challenging themselves. Hilly places such as Alps Mountains should be greatest places for holiday. Furthermore the most enjoyable part of traveling for adventure is the surprising part. Travelers have no expectation what’s waiting for them. Whatever, facing the travelers would be in the memory. Adventure events should be like pictures to look after it when they want to memorize their vacation. For example, if traveler decides to travel to an African country they have to join safari journey. No doubt in safari traveler enjoys watching new kinds of animals such as predators and prey. Moreover, diving the one of the most extreme leisure adventure. Traveler can see different kind of sea creatures during their holyday. For example, read sea considered a charm place to dive in and enjoy the spare time. Traveling for adventure is a joyful experience that makes traveling one of the best leisure activities. Traveler who don’t have sea in their country should start to plane to kill two birds with one stone. Traveler will forget how much time they spend for fishing. Fishing is a part of adventure because traveler will surprise will surprise by different kind of creatures they could catch. According to her article, “Fishing ascension bay and espiritu santo bay,” .Kristine(2011)”There is no substitute for experience your writer, Edward Johnston,of leisure time travel, has visited this part of the yucatan peninsula 29 times in the past twenty years and has caught 80 permit on a fly rod at ascension bay.”

 

 

Third, traveling should be regarded leisure when it’s combining with sight seen and fun places. Traveler must not lose the chance the sight seen during their vacation. For exampleTaj Mahal is famous sight seen in India.   Traveling to India will not considered as leisure activity if the traveler missed the chance to visit Taj mahal. In addition, there is nice parks to spend spare time in such as the one in Singapore. In his article, “Exit to exotica,” Winton (1992) stated that many theme parks built in Singapore, but the most exciting two are villa and sentosa Island’s underwater world. 

 

 

Watching sight seen and fun places during the vacation make it unforgettable moments. Jurassic park is one of the most interesting parks to visit .Travelers with deferent ages will love to visit it and spend the hall day between playing and watching dinosaurs world. Additionally, having a picture with princes Diana in holiday or any famous person should not be missed when traveler decide to visit the wax museum in London.

 

 

 In general and according to shawn , (2007). Said that “You need to be working toward your goals, and taking time off allows you to refresh yourself and refocus on the task ahead. “ Since taking a break refreshing mind,traveling would be the most leisure activity because it gives relaxation, it gives scene of adventure, and the chance of visiting sight seen. In brief Traveling have infinite kind of pleasers.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

References

*Loftus, M . (2008, Jan .Feb). Slow down- we’r movin too fast : by putting the        leisure back in leisure travl , we can enrich our experiences other benefits: reduced carbon emissions and more jetlag. Retrieved http://go. Galegroup, com /ps/retrieve. Do? sg Hit count & Sort=DA_sort&inps=+

*Mokhtarian, P. L. , & Salomon, Ilan(2001.Aug13). How derived is the demand for travel? Some conceptual and measurement considerations.

 

*Shawn, Lam. (2007. Sep). your 2008 vacation.

Retrieved http:// b1152w.blu152. mail. Live. Com/mail/Inboxlight.aspx?n=324307657.

 

Winton, K. (1992.Apr) .Exit to exotica. Mangment today. Retrieved

 

 

 

 

comments:

First, you should add more CI in paragraphy four.

Second, you have made a great improvement in this eassy. However, you need to pay more attention to add leisure in some examples.

Third, the references are not clear. Maybe the computer's problems.

 

                                                                                                                                                                                           Chris 

 

SECOND DRAFT

Name:

Course: IEP/510/520 Core

Prof. Christine Bauer-Ramazani

 

 

 

FIRST DRAFT

Name:

Course: IEP/510/520 Core

Prof. Christine Bauer-Ramazani

 

 

SECOND DRAFT

Name:

Course: IEP/510/520 Core

Prof. Christine Bauer-Ramazani

 

 

Eating at home / Eating at a restaurant

              Do you prefer to eat at a restaurant or at home? Jonsson’s study (2006)  shows that “American restaurants will bring in above a half-trillion dollars in total sales” (para. 7) . Nowadays life style determines where people have their meal. Eating at home is more preferred for several reasons which are economic, health, and time management.

               Time plays an important role for choosing the place of having a meal. For example, employers and students have no time to satisfy their hunger inside the home. Students and employers spend a long time outside the home because they have to do a lot of tasks at school or work. Since employer and students are busy, they prefer to eat at restaurants. Sometimes restaurants could be crowded; therefore, customers have to wait a long time to find a seat. In contrast, a house wife has enough time to prepare the foods, and serve it in a short  time .In addition, there is a special and ready place for each member in the dining room at the table. Each family member doesn’t  have to wait a long to find a seat. However eating at home takes time, helping house wife from each family member to prepare foods saves time.

            Who is more obese? People who eat at home? or people who eat at restaurant? Foods that is served in a restaurants is full of calories and fat. Chiefs who cook in a restaurants want to finish their work and serve the food quickly, so they don’t pay attention to the amount of oil or cheese they add it. On the other hand, eating at home is much healthier because the cooker can control the amount of oil needed.  Also people who cook at home control the amount of food because the cooker knows how much he/she need. It is healthier to eat at home because food is well done. While in a restaurant cooker could serve food that is prepared several days ago and just re- heat it .In addition, Fouts &Bovee (n.d) says that” not only is not healthy, but most people don’t know what a proper portion size is”(Para 6). They tend to overeat and maybe eat the whole plate because they already have paid for it. No doubt, eating the whole amount of foods in the restaurant cause obese.

 

        Eating at restaurants not only causing obese but also it causes poverty.  Eating at home is more economic because buying things and cook it is cheaper than eating at restaurant. For example we can buy things from grocery that costs 20 dollars and enough for one week and contain all minerals. In contrast, in a restaurant we could spend 20 dollars or more for one kind of food. Besides the meal, a restaurant charges the customer for service too. Person could find himself in a financial problem because he/she become out of money before the end of the month. Moreover restaurant prices depend of the restaurant classifications .To have good food we should choose expensive restaurant; otherwise, we will become sick of bad quality of food.

Both eating at restaurant and cooking at home have two sides of coins. Everyone choose what fit with their life style. In general, eating at home is healthier, cheaper , and with time management will be faster too. In brief, people should choose what they eat and how it cooked in order to keep their health in good condition.

 

 

 

 

References

Fouts, D. ( N.d ). Eating out v.s Eating at Home:

            Retrieved from: http://www.passivwfamilyincome.com.

Eating at home and eating at a restaurant (2000).

               Retrieved from: http://www.moneycentral.msn.com

 

 

 

 

 

 

 



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